Elephant Butt

Three years ago, on a Friday, I was talking with one of the ladies downstairs before leaving and she mentioned they were going to the Delaware fair that night. I made the greatest error in judgment of my life saying something that I thought was humorous and clearly was not shared by my friend.

She had been telling me they were so busy that they missed the Ohio State Fair a month earlier, but she was excited to go to the Delaware County fair as an alternative. "We didn't get our elephant ears this summer." She used a voice saying this that was almost child like and funny which I think led to the next comment.

"Looks like you got your elephant butt."

Let's examine the options I could have made.

Elephant tusks? Doesn't make sense.
Elephant trunk? Nope.
Elephant legs? It just did not spring to mind and seems worse even now in my humble opinion.

So, "Elephant Butt," it was.

Yes. it was funny for the microsecond as she was bent over (facing me) until she whipped up and had daggers in her eyes and a look of surprise that I would EVER dare make that crack (pun intended.). Seriously, I didn't even think. It flew out of my mouth without thought. I swear, the look on her face... I was in big trouble.

I had known her for a couple years to that point and I had a sudden realization that there are some things I should NEVER joke about.

Even though she does not have an elephant butt. She had a baby a year earlier and joined a "Biggest Loser" contest at work and she lost 42 pounds! She looked great and was lighter than before she even got pregnant, but it still didn't allow me to get away with what was meant as a harmless comment on my part.

That said, the joke made it way through the department and others in the company. They saw why I made the connection from elephant ears to elephant butt. They thought it was funny in the sense that I actually blurted it out, like a complete idiot, however, every woman who heard it has told me never to make a joke about a woman's butt.

It was not about her butt! It was about the elephant ear! :)

By Monday, she was joking about it and would tease me for a couple years before she left the company.

And I will never, never, never joke about that in the future.

A trip past the Renaissance Fair

On the way out, along the PA Turnpike to See two Springsteen shows in 2007, Chris Papa and I saw a sign on the road:

DISCOUNT
RENAISSANCE FAIRE [yes, it had an 'E' on the end]
TICKETS

I asked aloud, "Why would anyone want tickets to a Discount Renaissance Fair?" He said they were discount tickets for a Renaissance Fair. We discussed and debated for 10 minutes. You can't buy this kind of entertainment.

We enjoyed the two Springsteen shows immensely. We also dined at a Sheetz Gas station. If you get the chance to do this in Pennsylvania, they have great subs and you can order from the gas pump!

Coming back on the Turnpike in PA on Sunday, we stopped at the Midway Service Plaza and we saw four people exit a car with the two women wearing what can only be described as loosing fitting, frilly, cheap knockoff Renaissance Fair outfits. We agreed it was tickets for a discount Renaissance Fair.